What is it like to be skinny?

What is it like to be skinny?
What is it like to already be pretty?
To not feel eyes watching your weight, your food, your space?
What is it like to not take up space?
To not hear whispers and creaks with each step you take.
How does it feel to not pay to exist and to breathe
With your self esteem and interest payments in comedy.
How dare you say those three words so casually!
As if you understand the lining of my waistband.
How dare you question my health?
Show me your PhD!
Food is a friend turned enemy.
If I skip a meal maybe I can experience beauty.
Maybe I won't be looked at with disgust or discomfort.
I can be light on my feet, wear nice clothes without judgement.
But the physical realm is not so kind.
And I have to make my own happiness in the mirror,
While I fight my biggest demon:
myself.